Baby talk

not too long ago (like 2 months) i wasn’t sure if i wanted to have another baby

i wasn’t sure if i could ever (ever) love another like i love Lily

i wasn’t sure if i wanted to lose myself again after i just got myself back

i wasn’t sure if i could be a good mother to two since sometimes i feel like i’m not even being a good mother to one

then for the past two weeks my body was acting all funny

signs of pms but times 100

i thought, maybe?

could i be?

and the feeling of excitement over the possibility of being pregnant returned

the picture you see above is from this morning

i’m not pregnant

but when i went to bed last night and when i woke up this morning i wanted to be

and that just shows me that i can love another like i love Lily

and it shows me that i am ready and have changed my mind

and that makes me happy

(coincidentally, today, three years ago was when we found out we were pregnant with Lily)