as forty approaches

i am in my last month of my thirties

in exactly one month from today, i will be forty

my thirties did not start out that well

i was married to a man i had loved for seven years, living in hoboken nj and working a dream job in nyc

that actually sounds just about perfect doesn’t it? until it all crashed down on me

my marriage ended and so did my job

lost and completely broken down, i decided to pack my life up and start over again right here in miami where i have stayed since

there were many tears and lonely moments

in my thirties i learned how to live on my own (like really on my own), be by myself and get to know myself without fear, make new friends, let go of some old friends, i started painting again and found the artist in me with a different way of drawing and painting, for six years i worked at a great high end retail job with a wonderful team of people who became dear friends, i sold more than i ever had before in my life, i traveled and with the help of my parents i bought my first place on the beach in a building right next to a best friend

the tough times had passed, i was finally a better version of myself again when, not looking i met Will

in my thirties i lost love but i also found love. again

in my thirties i became a wife. and a mother

in my thirties i settled in to me. as a daughter. as a sister. as a friend. as a wife. as a mother. as an artist. as me

i can only hope that my forties will be a continuation of how wonderful half of my thirties have been

and with that hope, i welcome my forties because i think the best of me (and everything else) is still yet to come