everyday life

R.I.P Lee McQueen

I just heard that Lee McQueen, the designer for Alexander McQueen passed away and I am truly sad.

As an artist and a fashion lover, I have admired the fashion, vision and talent of Lee McQueen since the early 90’s.

I can honestly say that fashion has lost one of its most innovative artists/designers.

Rest in peace Lee McQueen, fashion will miss you, and so will I.

Identity crisis

Mine, not Lily’s.

Yesterday I had a total identity crisis meltdown.Β  Or at least I think that’s what it was.

Becoming a stay at home mom is a bit harder than I thought. Not because of the house work or having to spend my whole day with Lily (because I wouldn’t want it any other way) but, because my daily routine is no longer what it used to be. It is no longer just about me. HELLO! Wake up call.

Also, not going back to work and becoming financially dependent on Will freaks me out! Of course Will and I discussed all of this before and while I was pregnant but, it is easier said than done. Although I always budgeted and never spent more than I could afford, I always still shopped and bought myself whatever I pretty much wanted.

This is something that for a while will not happen.

And what I want to buy and wear, I can’t anyway. Breast feeding is wonderful and the best thing for babies however, it limits a wardrobe. I always have to have something that has easy breast access.

I used to take time and pride in the way I looked, even while pregnant but, now my daily uniform is a pair of jeans, a tank top (so there is no stomach showing when I breast feed) and some sort of top over that so the breast is not fully exposed while feeding.

So long are the shift dresses, pretty blouses. So long is the Claudia that used to take pride in the way she looked. Now, I take pride in the way Lily looks. It’s easier.

This makes me feel at times like my identity has been lost. Am I Claudia who is Lily’s mom or am I Lily’s mom who used to be Claudia?

All this plus a huge shift in hormones has amounted to some crying spells and like I said, to some identity crisis melt downs.

I just have to remember that she won’t be a little baby forever (i need to cherish every moment), to take it a day at a time and things will eventually get easier.

Right!!??? (sigh…)

Diapers

Where should I begin????

When I was still pregnant with Lily, Will and I discussed and did research on many different options for diapers for Lily once she was born.

Cloth diapers maybe? Both Will and I were raised on cloth diapers and although times have changed, many new moms have started using them again. For us however, because we don’t have our own washer and drier in the apartment, it didn’t seem like the right choice.

Environment friendly diapers like Seventh Generation? Maybe. But, then I read the worst reviews about them. Sure everyone liked the fact that they were “green” but complained about fit, leaks and diaper rash. I didn’t want that for my Lily.

At the end, it was between Pampers and Huggies.

We chose the Pampers Swaddlers which we really liked up until lately. When Lily was smaller, there were few leaks or spills however, it seems that every time she goes #2 now, if we are not right there to change her diaper, it either spills from the back or from the legs. It is horrible!

So, we are back to the beginning. Which diapers now?

Shall we try Huggies? I wish Diapers.com would have a value pack of different diaper brands in the same pack so you could try and see which one works for you.

Well, after much research again, we have both decided to try the gDiapers. They are a bit more expensive but I like the fact that they have a gPant that covers the either cloth refills or theΒ  flushable diaper refills which happen to not only be flushable but you can also garden compost the wet ones. So they are “green”!

I found that LuckyVitamin.com had the best deals in both the gPants and the refills.

Wish us luck! πŸ˜‰

Go to sleep and let us sleep!

I think I wrote too soon…

Sleep” was posted a couple of days ago where I wrote about Lily’s sleeping patterns being consistent. HA! They are all over the place once again.

Last night for the second night in a row, she woke up every 1.5-2 hours. Not fun.

She hardly slept during the day. Mind you, she had a very busy and stimulating day yesterday with lots of action and people around her.

Let’s just hope this is another growing spurt and that everything will be back to normal soon. Whatever “normal” is nowadays….

Here is Lily at Zeke’s with auntie K, daddy Will and I checking herself out on the video that auntie K took of her. Lily is wearing a Boatneck graphic T and her Turtle hat both by babyGap.

The night she was gone…..but she was here!

When I was pregnant with Lily, before I would fall asleep, I would hold and rub my belly and in Portuguese I would say to her: Boa noite Lily. Faz O-O. Dorme bem. (Good night Lily. Go night night. Sleep well).

I did this EVERY night before I would fall asleep.

Then, Lily was born and for the first couple of nights, with the excitement and exhaustion of her being here, I would just fall asleep. Until, the third or fourth night when I went to hold and rub my belly and realized there was nothing there. Tears starting building and I just cried. She was gone…

I looked over and there she was was in her bassinet next to me. She was here!

It was a brief bitter sweet moment. She was no longer inside me where she was all mine πŸ™ but she was here for the world to see. πŸ™‚

Here we are below just a few hours after getting home from the birthing center. Lily wears a full bodysuit by babyGap and her blanket is whynottsewn.

Things we LOVE!

Our friend Rikki who works at Wolf Creek Gallery gave us this Mini-Violet Girl Doll by BlaBla the last time we visited her at work.

BlaBla not only makes dolls, they also make rattles, backpacks, clothing, blankets, finger puppets and mobiles.

Everything is made from natural fibers of exceptional quality grown in Peru and knitted by Peruvian artisans.

It’s Lily’s first doll and we just LOVE it.

Here is Lily wearing a bodysuit by The Children’s Place with her Mini-Violet Girl Doll by BlaBla.

Ugh! hair EVERYWHERE!!!!

My hair is everywhere! All over the floor, all over my clothes, all over my brush, in the car, in the bed, EVERYWHERE!

It’s falling off in hand fulls. Every time I wash it, I’m surprised I come out with hair still on my head.

When I was pregnant with Lily, my hair was at its best. Long, shiny, full and it never EVER fell off.

I know this is what happens after giving birth, your hormones change once again and even though prenatal vitamins are still being taken, there is nothing that can be done. It just needs to happen.

I wish I could get my pregnant hair back…..

Things we LOVE!

We LOVE our frog. The Bugaboo Frog stroller that is that granma Hayes and avo Joao got for us at Genius Jones.

This was another item that Will and I did a lot of research on however, I knew that I wanted the Frog. It was just a matter of convincing Will. Being a new parent and all, we were not used yet to the insane prices of certain things.

The Frog is light, durable, folds down well, comes in great colors (we chose orange) and most importantly it came with a bassinet. Lily slept comfortably in that bassinet for the first 2 months of her life.

So thank you granma Hayes and avo Joao!

You can see Lily below totally stylin’ in her Frog.